Releasing Attachments & Building Relationships

Having an attachment to someone is not the same as building a relationship with them. An attachment can be one-sided and an attempt to fulfil an unmet need in yourself. A relationship requires more from both people. Forming attachments can be a helpful stage on the healing journey and a sign of progress after a period of isolation or over-independence. Maintaining attachments to past relationships may also be part of a process of rebuilding and regaining strength after a difficult period of change. When these attachments no longer satisfy our inner need for relationship, it is time to take the next step towards building fulfilling, two-way relationships. Old patterns will now surface and the trapped emotions, that limited us to one-way attachments, may come up to be released. This may be uncomfortable, even overwhelming at times, but the cleansing process will ultimately lead closer to the life we desire in our heart. How can we help this process to unfold and allow the new life to emerge?

Having the courage to slow down, and drop into a place of calm and peace, will allow space for old impulses and thought-patterns to surface. What are you tired of? What is it that's so dissatisfying about your life just now? How have you tried, unsuccessfully, to overcome these issues in the past? In craniosacral therapy, we allow the session to drop into stillpoints - moments of stillness, calm, peace and a sense of aliveness. This allows the cellular fluids to expand and flow, washing away the sediment that was held in old postures of tension and driveness. As the old fears, anxieties and thoughts surface, we can allow them to safely pass through, observing the old passing away to make way for fresh perspectives and ability to act. The Pathway Balancing Kinesiology journey starts with Touch for Health basic energy balancing, then takes us into the more advanced realms of holistic health to restore physical, emotional and electromagnetic aspects of health. We can then begin the journey of embodying more of our soul, through the heart, enlivened by the spirit. Taking time to appreciate the beauty of where we are can bring up grief at what has been lost. Breathing in peace, calm and safety can create gratitude to God for bringing us so far from our painful past. We can acknowledge our attachments as emotional and relational 'trainer wheels', helping us steady ourselves as we move away from past unhealthy connections and towards more open, healthy contacts. Vulnerability and openness are essential in building worthwhile, growing relationships. In an atmosphere of threat, oppression or neglect, it is not possible or desirable to cultivate these essential relational qualities. Take time to be at peace for a while, to revitalise, restore and reconnect with your aliveness. When you are ready, the trickle of new life will alert you that things are changing. Don't panic. Don't lose that sense of peace and calm within and around you. Take it with you into your new life and trust that all will fall into place gently, as you nurture your ability to care - both for yourself and others. Enjoy the journey.

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Mind Body Soul - Peterborough 2013

This was our 3rd year at Peterborough's Mind Body Soul Weekend at the East of England Showground and probably our most enjoyable. The mix of exhibitors this year was particularly friendly, supportive and interactive as we visted each other's stands over the weekend. It was a busy and profitable event for Pathway Balancing with people waiting for their turn to have a taster session of kinesiology. On Saturday our stand was visited by Shelley from Peterborough Radio and we were asked to give an interview for her programme about the Show, which was broadcast at 9pm the following Wednesday on 87.7FM and is now available on YouTube.This year's talk was given at 4pm on Saturday and was a little different from previous years. Rather than a demonstration with a Pathway Balancing Practitioner, I invited members of the audience to come up and be muscle-tested as a representative of the group. We then carried out a group energy balancing session, taking everyone on the Pathway Balancing Journey to experience the shifts in energy and awareness for themselves. Our session took us to Level 2 'The Community' and issues around love and relationships. We cleared a group energy block of stress which had a powerful impact on the people present. It revealed new material for a new Direction in the Pathway Balancing Gateway called 'Having a Sense of Ourselves as Being Sacred'. Overall the whole weekend was a great success and thoroughly enjoyable. The first enquiry about the next training course has already come in and there is also interest in our October Workshop on 'Prosperity and Financial Freedom'. If you were at the event, remember you can claim a 60% Discount off the October Workshop or the January training unit. You may also claim the discount if you quote this Blog as reference. To book for the 'Prosperity' Workshop on Sunday 27th October, send your £8 deposit now. For January's Touch for Health 1 training, send £24 deposit to book your place today. See our website for more details or call us on 01733 555 133 from Monday to Thursday between 10am and 8pm. Corrina.

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Lowering the Drawbridge

Candace Pert says, in her book 'Molecules of Emotion', that the body is the subconscious. In craniosacral therapy, we work with embodied memories held in the posture and body tissues. In Pathway Balancing Kinesiology we also work with the concepts of the Drama Triangle and Unity Triangle. Both therapies encourage surrender to the natural flow of life in the body, thereby avoiding becoming stuck in ever-repeating, sabotaging patterns. In the Drama Triangle, we take up a position in our relationships of an Oppressor, Rescuer or Victim. All these positions are centred around emptiness, neediness, deprivation and desperation and create reactions to get attention or control. We are reacting to life behind a hard, defensive wall. In the Unity Triangle, we place God at the top, as our highest priority and first in all we do. The other positions are side by side with another person, considering not only our own needs but also theirs. The Unity Triangle centres around divine power, fulfilment, care, appreciation and love. Our boundaries are softened and sensitive. We are alive. What happens now, when we face the edge of our world?

Now we come to the edge again, but this time our vision is focussed on the things we value most. We know we can find the courage and support to go for our dreams again. As we step forward, we can see that we are in a new season, preparing for a new birth, for fulfilment of a long held dream. We have matured in our experience of the whirlwind and now we know how to stretch out our wings and ride the spiralling currents. In this way we come down to land and realise, as we look back, that we have crossed the abyss. We have made it to the Promised Land. We are safe. And now it's time to lower the drawbridge, to open the way for a new life to begin. Our bodies feel good again; the sacral bone can be unstuck, the bowels begin to move, feet and legs are warm and life returns to our lower body, no longer uptight with defensiveness. We are safe and strong, supported and loved. As the drawbridge is lowered, who will emerge into this new, different, way of life?

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BSSK Mind, Body & Spirit - Wood Green 2013

A special welcome to all our visitors, the other exhibitors and the organisers of the 2013 BSSK Mind, Body & Spirit Weekend held at the Wood Green Animal Shelter, Godmanchester. It was the first time Pathway Balancing had taken a stand at this event and we really enjoyed being there. It was a spacious and light venue with an atmosphere of generosity and friendship among the exhibitors. On Saturday, our student Owen Wheatley offered test sessions of the 'Power vs Force' levels of consciousness, based on the work of Dr David R Hawkins, which generated interest from visitors to our stand. On both days we were giving mini-sessions of Food Intolerance/'Allergy' Testing which revealed much about the diets of those who opted for testing. Only one person had a food intolerance, whilst others needed to actually decrease the amount of raw food in their diet, time their food supplements for their evening meal or avoid combining beans with either white pasta or apples & pears. For one client, we established that diet was fine but the symptoms were rooted in stress. The most popular sessions were for Pathway Balancing Journeys and we were working at our maximum capacity on both afternoons. Our clients were all at impressively high levels on the Journey, most being at Levels 5 & 6; Dreamweaver and Trans-formation, with almost everyone having something for 'Healing the Soul'. We even added new material to the manuals, with one particularly memorable addition.

One lady was looking for guidance on using her spiritual gifts. During her session, we needed to extend the new, un-named section of the 'Healing the Soul' manual and she sensed the powerful presence of an angel with her. The messages that came through for her told us that each of us has the ability to hear from spiritual sources but it's important to discern the source, intention and heart of the voice we are hearing. This new part to the manual signals that a new season has begun for the person who reaches this point and to be ready for a new beginning.

On Sunday afternoon, Sue Preston-Eyles and I gave a talk and demonstration of the Pathway Balancing Journey to a group in the Event Meeting Room and we decided to give a group balance. Our Journey took us to Level 6, Trans-formation, Gateway 54 and the Direction 'Flowing Power' which has the Pathway of 'Rising to new levels with more enriching resources'. Our group journey completed at the Viewpoint 'Holding a position of leadership, in truthfulness and integrity, is empowering for all concerned.' The feedback was fantastic! People said the atmosphere was really special and they could feel the energy shifting and changing. Each person enthusiastically asked for the leaflets we had for Individual Therapy and the Personal Development Training Course.

There was also a little bit of time, over the weekend, to visit other stands and I had a wonderful session of 'Matrix Energetics' with Wai Cheung on his 'Trans.Form' stand. I highly recommend him and his work. He is impressively knowledgeable about the science behind energy work and has a passion for his work and a heart for people. Overall, Sue, Owen and I thoroughly enjoyed the whole event and are looking forward to the next one with BSSK in 2014. If you can't wait that long, come to our next stand, at the Peterborough Mind, Body, Soul Weekend on Saturday & Sunday 21st & 22nd September 2013 at the Excel Centre, East of England Showground. See you there!

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A Heart of Gold

Sometimes we say a person has a heart of gold. We may mean that they are a good person, kind, generous or dependable. Is it a good thing to have a heart of gold? Maybe something so precious needs to be protected in case it's taken from us. Perhaps helping other people leaves us tired or burdened. Life may be going along fine & then one phone call, a minor slip-up or a major event in our nation's economy can suddenly shake us. Living a golden life may be appealing but many people sabotage their dreams because of unresolved, embodied experiences of loss, which they do not wish to repeat. On the Pathway Balancing journey, Gateway 50 is the highest Gateway at the Dreamweaver Level. It takes us to 'a Life of Love, Power & Overflowing Abundance' but some people stall at this Gateway & have to back-track for some 'Healing of the Soul' before they can go through it. Many of us have had experiences that we never want to repeat - a whirlwind of change, uncertainty, desperation, choices made under pressure or facing the loss of almost everything that mattered to us. So how do we step forward into living our dream in such an uncertain world?

Many people cope with stress by shutting down to a certain degree - not caring any more, ignoring the needs of their body, holding back effort or criticising others. This may work in the short term but in time it can create apathy, depression, burn-out or isolation. It may take a sudden illness or relationship crisis to act as a wake-up call to change direction. Sadly, many people lose an opportunity by blaming others or seeing their symptoms as just an illness caught at random with no deeper underlying cause. The Pathway Balancing journey shows that we are shaped by our circumstances and that we can make new choices that will give us a life worth living. Being fully alive means that we have energy, resources, caring relationships, fulfilling activities, a healthy curiosity about life and confidence to express who we are. Behind Gateway 50, the Clearing area tells us that 'We find the richness of life by going through the dark times and knowing we'll never have to go back'. Part of the work involves the new Step of 'Seeing our mistakes, having compassion for all concerned, having forgiveness & mercy, & knowing we'll never go back'. Once we're balanced enough to clear this issue, we realise we've learnt our lessons and won't make those same poor choices again. This frees us to move in another Direction and follow a new Pathway of 'Refining by being tested and being found to be genuine'. The final Step on this Pathway is 'We have passed the test and been proven to have integrity and a genuine heart of gold'. We can safely live the golden life because we've learnt that storms come and seasons change but, through 'Healing the Soul', we've developed a heart of gold and learnt the way to 'Surrender to Life as the Cultivation of Prosperity'.

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Seeds of Change

Gateway 5 on the Pathway Balancing Journey is 'The Power of Balance' and describes a place of transition, a time of barrenness and emptiness after some kind of war has ended in our lives. We may look around at our life and see overwhelmimg conditions that need attending to, like weeds overgrown on a fertile plot of land, or cobwebs and clutter in the house. This Gateway is reached when a major pattern has been released from our lives and the shackles  that held us back are now unlocked. It is found by people who've said to themselves "There must be a better way." and have now discovered it. It is a point where we realise we've survived the trauma and are really OK now. We are healed. We are a normal person and life is stable. The Overview of this Gateway tells us 'The seeds of the future are already present in this land, and the process of change encourages us to look at the things around us and observe their differences.' The way forward now is to open this Gateway and find a new way of being. It tells us we are 'Harvesting the fruits of experience and wisdom' and are now 'holding the seeds for the future'. We are at a crossroads and must decide which pathway to follow from here. As we open Gateway 5, we come into the Clearing 'Growing into Heaven'. This is about 'feeding the seeds of our dreams'. It is important to take stock and ask yourself what you really enjoy in daily life and examine your core values. How have you dealt with situations in the past when your values have not been upheld? Did you use confrontation, manipulation or dissociation? How do you find new solutions that don't involve giving in your notice, trying too hard to please another or sacrificing your own needs? In Pathway Balancing we apply a wealth of remedies and techniques to shift the old energies into new, fresh perspectives. For example, an Aura Soma Pomander can refresh our senses and help us see a different angle for the next step. 'Growing into Heaven' involves 'clearing away the rubbish' and 'sorting the seeds from the weeds'. As we focus on the things we appreciate and care about, we create a nurturing atmosphere that fills and emanates from our heart. This week a new Step was added to the Pathway around this Clearing: 'It is now safe to enjoy your freedom and being with the people who share your sense of joy in being alive'. It is time to stop pretending that something is OK when it isn't. It's time to stop colluding with ideas and behaviour that are insane. Now is the time to create freedom by planting the seeds of change in the world around you, to bring life where there was barrenness. Now it is the freedom that comes from honestly accepting yourself as an ongoing work in progress that releases you from the shackles of anxiety and insecurity. It is freedom by acceptance that someone is the way that they are and knowing you have power to make choices. Wait while someone goes off the path for a while and see if they come back. You will know more of the truth of who they are. Tell someone you don't like the way they have dealt with you and ask them how things could work better. You will open the possibilty for transformation. Stop warring against yourself and others and discover the Viewpoint of Growing Towards Freedom. Life is worth living and God gives us everything we need to enjoy life to the full and in true richness. Open your heart and keep filling it with better things every moment, then share those things generously with others.

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Behind a Pane of Glass

This week, someone described his years of depression as "Living behind a pane of glass, seeing life happening but unable to feel or be a real part of it." He didn't enjoy his work and didn't have the girlfriend he longed for. Through his 'pane of glass', he looked normal to the outside world, successful in his career and having a good social life, but inwardly he felt empty and that life was pointless. This disconnected feeling is a sign that growth has somehow halted along the path of life. We all grow up with imperfect parents and sometimes we can't develop the mechanisms of connectedness if those around us didn't know how to speak the languages of love. Although the framework of our personality is established in childhood, the brains potential for growth and change is phenomenal and we can break down old patterns and embody new ones over time. This is a key element of the work at Pathway Balancing.

The Pathway Balancing Journey is about reconnection and relatedness. The horizontal connection is initially through finding the practitioner, maybe by word-of-mouth, at an event or show, or via the internet. Once that human contact is established, the Pathway Balancing system begins to restore health and energy, ready for the vertical connection to Divine power. This Divine connection will be a personal experience of raised awareness, or higher consciousness, that gives each individual a sense of something they can come back to at anytime - a secure connection to creation, to limitless potential and to the heartbeat of life itself. The Transcendent Levels, at the height of the Journey, are about Heart Consciousness. Here the individual has an open heart, capable of being filled by an appreciation for all that God provides on a moment by moment basis. As the heart is filled to overflowing, by a constant awareness of life flowing and unfolding, it's possible to feel increasing joy and contentment. As the heart begins to feel more of God's grace and presence, the pane of glass, that was once a wall between us and the world, begins to reflect back to us how happy we are to be reconnected with our Divine Creator. We begin to see our reflection in the people around us, smiling, laughing, being kind & generous, gentle, imperfect and vulnerable. We begin to realise we have crossed to the other side of that pane of glass. We are no longer depressed, separated, restless, exhausted or unfulfilled. We have made the breakthrough and a new season, a new way of life, has already begun.

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The Courage to Make it Through

The difference in the results from therapy sessions or training courses is made by the persons ability to press on through to a successful outcome. This ability will be mirrored in the person's approach to life. What happens when results don't come quickly enough, meet our high expectations or match our fantasies? How do we respond to pressures, obstacles or disappointments? Therapy and training give an opportunity to face life in microcosm. Craniosacral therapy and kinesiology explore embodied patterns that may be holding back our dreams and impoverishing our lives. The gentle power of the methods used in both therapies can then release blockages, undo reactive patterns and allow the body to rebuild connections and restore flexibilty and flow. So where does courage come into all this?

The ethos of Pathway Balancing is heart-based living. The word courage comes from the Latin word cuer which means heart. So heart-based living would include the heart quality of courage; the power to face difficulty, fear or pain with confidence and to act in accordance with your beliefs. The Pathway Balancing Journey has the capacity to take people into better health, greater financial freedom and more fulfilling relationships. By focusing on the desired outcomes, a client or student can persevere through the difficult times in life, in the belief that something better is possible on the other side. Growing up in a familly where there was a lot of drama, moodiness, anxiety or reactivity can create embodied patterns of emotional disconnect. It becomes a habit for the child to withdraw into confusion, imagination, studying, sulking or running away. Persevering through a course of therapy or training enables the person to repattern these tendencies to disconnect. Where relationships with people have been the cause of hurt or disappointment, the way to healing can be through a transcendent relationship with God or a grounded relationship with Creation. Developing a safe, trusting relationship with a practitioner can help restore the ability to connect in relationship again. Having the courage to keep coming for sessions when money is tight, aches and pains are flaring up or difficult issues are coming to the surface, will produce abundant rewards and give cause for celebration. The successfull outcome of therapy, training or life itself is greatly enhanced by the heart qualities of appreciation, gratitude, care, love and courage. It's all worth it once you realise you're going to make it through.

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How Far Have You Come?

At times on life's journey, it's good to reflect & share your story of how far you've come. It's good to see what you've now left behind before you move on closer to your dream and destiny. What prompted your own spiritual or personal development journey? What was going on in your life or in your heart at that time? What guidance has lead you to the place you're resting in now? The theme with clients this week has been the overwhelming effects of growing up with a lot of family drama. When we're children or teenagers, we have very little power to get way from our parents' drama. Most households have a degree of drama, such as arguing, sulking, making dramatic exits, shouting, threats or tears, but when the level is more than a young person can cope with where do they go to escape? As these escape patterns are formed, thay can stay with us for life and be very damaging to our personal and professional relationships. Without realising it, we can go on acting like a distraught teenager for decades - staying in bed late, arriving everywhere late or extremely early, cutting off or leaving people we disagree with, holding a posture of 'poor me', wearing tatty clothes or leaving our space untidy and messy. The escape routes we discover as teenagers can become exaggerated and engrained in unhealthy ways - alcohol, sexual attractions, excessive sports, driving off fast in a car, taking off on holiday again, working in low grade jobs just for the money. As these unhealthy patterns entangle our adult lives, many people begin to think "There must be a better way to live than this". It's this search for a new way to live that can propel us into a journey of spiritual seeking or personal development. How do we grow beyond the drama without resorting to old patterns that are proving unfruitful?

If we have only known drama and escape, we need new information and new connections to form a better way of life. We need people to show us how they made it through. We need systems and resources to lift us out of depression, anxiety, pain or confusion. In the Pathway Balancing system, we learn to replace the Drama Triangle with the Unity Triangle. This part of the healing journey teaches us how to find solutions that involve staying in a relationship, how to grow without cutting off from the other person and how to stay centred in what we need while also looking to the interests of others. The Pathway Balancing Journey is one that leads us to greater spiritual and emotional maturity. Along the way we may need to share our story of how far we've come, so others can find a better way too. Leave behind the myths of this world that drain and exhaust us. Your looks have nothing to do with your ability to enjoy a loving relationship. Striving to prove you're good enough at work cannot fulfill you. Trying to please an insecure partner never completes the desire for intimacy. Today you can be different. There is a better way.

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Secure in Freedom and Prosperity

Security and freedom can be difficult to reconcile, seeming to oppose each other in some ways. Some degree of insecurity is the norm for ordinary human beings living out an everday life in a wonderful but complex world. We have many ways of seeking a sense of security from around us: establishing routines, fitting in to please other people, holding on to our money, looking for 'secure' employment. When the things around us are shaken, we may lose our sense of security and feel we are falling to pieces. On the Pathway Balancing Journey, we learn to centre ourselves in an inner security, coming from our soul and through our heart. Over time this inner security will increasingly manifest as outer security: energy levels are improving consistently, relationships are lasting and more stable, finances are settling and less volatile. Life begins to move at the speed of balance and will therefore be more sustainable. So what do you want now?

Security and freedom are often symbolised financially and many people would welcome increased prosperity. But ask yourself why you want to prosper. If it's to accumulate more or better stuff, no amount of financial prosperity will ever satisfy you. What would an increased income, plentiful savings and absence of debt give you? Take time to contemplate this because it will give you the next step towards true prosperity for your soul. Search your heart for the answers. Perhaps prosperity would give you freedom - from your past, from slavery to money-lenders, from a mundane existence. Maybe prosperity would enable you to live in beauty - your home, place of work, your transport, clothing. Could you be more creative if you had more resources? Would you enjoy being generous to others, giving tips to the car wash staff, donating more to charity, giving or lending money to help someone out of a difficult patch? Once you know what you really value in life, you can begin living that way today. Your money will then express your sense of freedom and security and begin to work for you, rather than enslave you.

The Pathway Balancing manual 'Healing the Soul' has a whole section called 'Coming Into and Handling Propserity' with 13 layers of healing in this area. Next week, this material is being taught to the next group of Pathway Balancing practitioners, who will then be equiped to lead others to greater prosperity. To join the next personal development group journey, book your place now.

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3 Stages in Emotional Stability

As we develop greater emotional stability, we will also have more physical energy, better relationships and improved finances. Over the past week I have worked with clients at all three stages of emotional healing and stabilisation. I define these stages as: Reaction, Recovery and Redirection. Our initial emotional Reaction, to a situation or internal thinking, will be based on our embodied experiences of our past. We feel old emotions, such as fear, anger or grief. If these are deeply ingrained we will behave in ways that are out of proportion to the situation or we will be too overwhelmed to function effectively. In the Recovery stage we can process these emotions, perhaps by crying, shouting or calling someone for help. We may also feel very tired or even develop a migraine or other physical symptom. At the Redirection stage we can move on from the effects of the past and begin moving towards the future. How effectively we do this can be radically improved with Pathway Balancing therapies or training. Because Pathway Balancing is about embodiment of the heart and soul energies, making positive changes to mind and body will result in positve outcomes and enhanced flow of life energy in all areas. If we still hold a lot of old patterns from past difficulties, we may still react in unhelpful and uncomfortable ways when feeling pressurised or challenged. As we continue our journey of healing and raised awareness, we will pass through the Reaction stage more quickly and easily. Recovery will be less overwhelming and result in greater clarity and renewed energy once processed. The Pathway Balancing Journey will give specific information and insights for the Redirection stage. This means our Redirection will create an upward spiral towards our dreams and goals. We can focus on divine providence and God's wisdom to help us see things from a higher perspective. The currents of change will enable us to open our wings and explore the landscape before we decide where to settle. Emotional stability is not about non-feeling, it is about restoring equilibrium and Redirection from a a heart-centred perspective.

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When Past and Future Meet Edge to Edge

The 'Pathway Balancing Journey' is a spiralling Pathway that encircles the mountain you must overcome in order to reach 'Paradise on Earth', where you can receive 'Healing for the Soul' and develop a 'Transcendent' lifestyle. As patterns come full circle on this journey, we may find ourselves standing between two Gateways on the path. We can see and feel the old patterns of the life we are moving on from and, at the same time, see the new life forming tantalisingly on the horizon. The journey out of our wounded past may have looked like an impossible chasm before but now there is a moment of peace and waiting, as we stand on the edge, knowing we have reached the line. We are at the end of our old way of living but until we cross that line we still can't know how our new life will play out or shape up. The choices we make now will send us in a new direction and we must prepare well for navigating our way into this new place.

When our past and our future are edge to edge, we will have days where we feel old anxieties, frustration or tiredness well up in reaction to events and situations. Then almost immediately we will be able to pull upwards again and appreciate what we have, have compassion for the situations of others and know when to stand firm against external pressures that are not heart-based. Living edge to edge means seeing our past and our future reflected equally in the people around us. We will recognise our old patterns in our circle of relationships, seeing others pressing through issues we faced in the past, such as uncertainty in work, health problems surfacing, immature or self-absorbed ways of relating, needing their worlds to be small, reacting from inner insecurity or simply needing time to rest and heal for a while. Equally, we can turn around and meet people who are thriving in a work environment they enjoy, sensitive people capable of expressing their vulnerability, confident people who can respond flexibly to change, people willing to make adjustments in order to sustain and build a loving relationship. As we stand at the edge we will still feel the cold and hunger of the barren way of life we struggled with at the beginning of the journey. At this new edge, we will also see the blossom and new leaves that promise to fulfil us with good fruit and flavours in the months to come. At that line of edge to edge we have learnt to walk in the goodness of all the healthy, right choices we've made through years of listening to God's guidance for our lives. We can trust in Him to see us through now.

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Rediscovering Your Confidence

With confidence, we have so much power to deal with situations - without it we become overwhelmed and ineffective much more easily. Life rarely goes according to our plans and confidence helps us re-evaluate and redirect our energy and efforts. If we have been seriously overwhelmed in the past, we can lose our flexibility and creativity. The overwhelm of our resources can occur through a significant loss, such as bereavement, divorce, redundancy, or a business downturn. Overwhelm can also be rooted in childhood experiences that leave our self-confidence fragile. Bullying is a common cause of lost confidence. It is often the more subtle forms of childhood bullying that leave the biggest mark on our soul. These embodied patterns can be resolved to release energy for making a better life today and beyond.

Bullying may take the form of 'mind games' or emotional torment. An older sibling may put pressure on their younger brother or sister in a way that manipulates the whole family. For example, the older child may insist they are desperate for a drink, food or the toilet when the younger one is taking time to enjoy watching the animals at the zoo or choosing a new toy in the local department store. The harassed parents may give in to this pressure and go. Once everyone is firmly on the road home, the eldest reveals they are actually fine to 'hold on' now, throwing the little one into protests of unfairness that create an upset for the whole family. Mind games like these can also be played out by a parent, with deeper consequences for the children. Either way, the victim must find a way to cope or adapt. Coping strategies may include withdrawal, passivity, stubbornness, rigidity, outbursts of rage, a need to control things in the environment, perfectionism or trying to fix everyone's problems. Over time an unhealthy pattern can become ingrained, such as the need to be needed. In this adaptation, we need people to depend heavily on us and to look exclusively to us for their advice, practical help or emotional support. We unconsciously believe that if they don't need our help then they won't want to be with us or pay any attention to us. This can create a terrifying insecurity and stop us making progress towards real maturity and fulfilment.

Our healthy needs in relationship are for respect, appreciation, caring, being valued and being loved. We need to focus our mind on these qualities, consciously appreciating the beautiful and satisfying things in any moment. We need to build up these qualities in our way of relating to others. We need to find the support of helpful, caring, joyful people as often as possible. As our healthy needs are met, we will find the strength to let go - by crying, sleeping, shouting, singing, dancing, de-cluttering or having a therapy or training session. The old pattern will dissolve and renewed softness return to our shoulders, neck and face. As we focus on the things we appreciate right now, we will discover what really matters to us. We can shed the old defenses that are no longer needed and reveal more of the flowing, sparkling, bubbling, confident new person that was really there all the time.

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Leaving Home, but this Time with Your Soul

Leaving the home of our family of origin is a major rite of passage, probably happening around age 21years. However, leaving home fully, and stepping into the freedom of full maturity, may take years longer, even decades more or maybe never happens at all! Part of the Pathway Balancing Soul Journey may involve rooting out flawed patterns that we embody from our childhood family. When we are too small to understand the behaviour of our parents, we find ways to temporarily deal with our unmet needs until our parents are able to pay us adequate attention again. If our parents lack maturity, they may never understand, or be able to meet, our needs adequately. This can leave us with a gaping hole in our heart and soul that we try to fill as we grow bigger. Unfortunately, if we don't know how to fill these needs in a healthy way, we may choose temporary fixes that don't last and can actually harm us. We can grow up with self-sabotaging patterns that manifest more & more loudly in our lives until we are either forced to deal with the issue or be destroyed it.

If we leave our family home with a pattern of unmet needs, we will replicate the pattern of this hole in our soul. We will see it in our relationships - with other people, with God, with money and with ourselves. If there is a damaging or unsatisfying pattern in your life today, think back to your childhood and see when this began. Do you let people take advantage of you financially? Do you keep ending relationships or have people walked out on you? Have you burnt out trying to prove you are good enough? Once you hit the spot, you'll feel it as a strong emotional charge. Give yourself space to cry, shout, sleep or talk about it. Process this material as often as you have strength. The aim is not to forget that old pattern but to discharge the embodied emotion left behind by it. The day will come when you can think or talk about your worst moment with only a trace of the feeling associated with it. It is no longer a source of trauma but has become a valuable pearl of wisdom.

When you can go back to your childhood roots and face the truth of your hurts and wants, you can see the part of your soul that was left behind when the rest of you left home. That part of your soul has been trying to get your needs met all these years, wanting to be heard, to be understood, to be cared about. Now that you have rediscovered it, you can take it home with you. You can be kind to yourself, invest in your own development, choose to be around people who are gentle, fun, interesting and be able to avoid the nutters! Take time to forgive your parents, yourself and even God if you need to. Reclaim that part of your soul that was left behind in the childhood home and begin to enjoy the freedom and power of full adulthood from this day forward.

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Corrina Kennedy, Peterborough, Cambridgeshire UK. E-MAIL: corrina@pathwaybalancing.co.uk TWITTER: @pathwaybalance FACEBOOK: Pathway Balancing Kinesiology Training

Restructuring the Dream

An important aspect of the Pathway Balancing Kinesiology Journey is identifying and building a person's dream into a reality. This week we held the first PBK Practitioner Update Day for those qualified and practising as Pathway Balancing Kinesiologists and the bulk of new material given out was for the Healing the Soul manual and The Dreamweaver Level of the Journey. As any dream builds into reality, it looks and feels different from the way we imagined it would be. It may take years of planning, preparation and activity to create a sound base for your dream. There can come a point of zero-state, where suddenly you realise you've carried out all your plans, ticked-off the major points on your 'To Do List' and now all you can do is maintain the dream you've created and see what happens next. This zero-state turning point is the place to review and restructure the reality of your dream life. The Pathway Balancing Journey provides the awareness and energy-building that's needed for this defining moment.

Gateway 41 in The Dreamweaver Level is called 'Embracing Heart's Desire' and we received a whole new 'download' of Divine revelation for the Overview of this Gateway on the Update Day. It was about clearing away the residues of past wounds to our heart and preparing the ground for our new life to manifest. Part of this work involves healing our nervous system and sometimes we need space, rest and quiet times to help this process. The new 'downloads' we received for the 'Healing the Soul' manual revealed that we need to 'Release Patterns of Toxicity for New Beginnings' and that 'Your Heart Knows Your Destiny through Peace and Joy'. A great piece of wisdom in this new material told us that 'your destiny is inextricably linked with so many others that it cannot possibly unfold at exactly the pace that is ideal for you'. So we must accept times that are quieter or busier than we would like as the multifaceted dream takes shape. To restructure the dream, we must let go of old pictures of how we wanted our life to be. We must drink in all the goodness that God has provided for us. Our hearts can open again to the greater truth of who we are now, as a result of the refining process of going for our dreams. We are stronger because of our journey on the mountain path and have found the courage to live the truth. We are free to be who God designed us to be because we have surrendered the illusion of control and exchanged it for the truth of loving life as it flows and sparkles around us.

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To discover and build your dream into a reality, contact me on Corrina@pathwaybalancing.co.uk Corrina Kennedy, Peterborough, Cambridgeshire UK

Is There a Financial Hole in Your Soul?

The nation of the UK is weighed down by a government debt of unimaginable size and this pattern is cascaded down into organisations, businesses and the lives of most individuals. On a pathway of spiritual and personal growth, it is possible to overlook finances as not being a spiritual matter, but money can be an indicator of the condition of our soul. In Biblical teaching we are advised to be neither a borrower nor a lender and that God's will is that our soul should prosper and our lives be fruitful & generous. It is popular to say that we are where we are because of our choices. While that is true, we can only make choices from what's made available to us. We also choose from a place of limited knowledge about the future outcome of any choice we make. Our choices will also reflect our inner sense of security, self-worth and any woundings in these areas. So rather than judge or condemn the choices we've made in the past it is a more healing process to make healthier choices about our finances from today. So do you have a financial hole in your soul?

Some people can be given every help and opportunity to overcome a problem in life yet remain hard hearted and self-destructive in their choices. Those with a compassionate heart can become drawn into a downward spiral when attempting to help a self-sabotaging individual. Eventually there comes a point of no return, where there is nothing more that can be done to help a person and the safest choice is to step back and let the destructive individual go their own way. This process may take time and there may be a few 'old roots' to pull out if the person was close to you, such as a child, parent or spouse. You may need time to really ensure your 'ground' is thoroughly clear and then need space to recover your full strength again. Look at your finances and see if there is any area of lack, such as less income than you generated in the past. Is there any interest bearing debt that is leaking out the money that does come in? If letting go of a relationship involves financial damage, this can leave a hole in your soul that needs to be healed before you can contain the new life pouring in. Take stock, declutter, reorganise and rest. Realise the limits of your ability to control the flow of life. Call on the Holy Spirit to help you make wise choices today and you can look forward to greater freedom and peace tomorrow.

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Pathway Balancing can help you find healing for your soul. Contact Corrina@pathwaybalancing.co.uk today. Corrina Kennedy, Peterborough, Cambridgeshire, UK

Entering the Unity Triangle

Unhealthy relationships are often rooted in the Drama Triangle of an Oppressor, Victim and Rescuer. As we become more aware and mature in our relationships we see signs of the Triangle dissolving. The Victim realises they have a choice and acts on it, stepping out of the trap and into freedom. The Oppressor discovers they have no more power over the Victim and has an opportunity to see their own vulnerability and act more safely. The Rescuer finds that they are the one in need of care and attention and can behave with more tenderness. As the old patterns dissolve there is space for the new pattern to be woven and built up. The new pattern is the Unity Triangle, which comprises Self, Other and God. At the base of this Triangle are two people in relationship with one another. The relationship can be a close personal relationship, a friendship, a professional connection or any other form of one to one relationship. In the Drama Triangle there is a Parent-Child dynamic between people, with one behaving with a 'one-up' or 'one-down' attitude towards the other. The base of the Unity Triangle is characterised by an Adult-Adult dynamic, with each person accepting and respecting the value and uniqueness of the other. Communication is about seeking to understand the other person's point of view and then expressing your own truth as clearly as possible. There is a greater tolerance for the discomfort that comes with misunderstandings or differences of viewpoint or in values.

The real power and freedom of the Unity Triangle comes from placing God at the top of the Triangle. By opening our heart to God and surrendering to the flow of life in the Divine good plan for each person, we give freedom to ourselves and the other person. The burdens of perfectionism (Rescuer), false guilt (Victim) and a controlling spirit (Oppressor) can be lifted off our shoulders. We can trust God to guide us and provide for our needs, so taking the pressure off both sides of the equation. It becomes easier to be patient when waiting in a place of freedom. Compassion and kindness can manifest more readily when our heart is being filled by the abundance of God's creation and people. Relationships can flow in unity when the grace of God is at the centre of the three-corded strand that connects us with God and with each other.

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The Pathway Balancing Journey focuses on relationships at the 2nd Level of the 'mountain' pathway. Begin your own Journey towards wholeness by contacting me for an appointment by e-mailing Corrina@pathwaybalancing.co.uk Corrina Kennedy, Peterborough, Cambridgeshire UK

Finding Freedom From Over-Responsibility

In last week's Touch for Health kinesiology training we worked with an energy balancing technique called Emotional Stress Release or ESR. This method uses very light contact on specific points on the head. The points have been scientifically measured to show an increase in blood circulation to the frontal lobes of the brain when the ESR points are lightly held for a few seconds or minutes. The process of Emotional Stress Release uses kinesiology muscle-testing to find out which stressful situation is causing an energy weakness or 'switch-off' in a person. When we are overwhelmed by our thoughts and feelings during a stressful time, this further weakens our ability to respond in a helpful or clear way. Having a kinesiologist work with the ESR points has an amazing effect on our thinking, feelings and energy levels.

Taking responsibility in a crisis can be admirable and effective. However, there are many of us who tend towards over-responsibility and this is unhealthy for everyone involved. Over-responsible people are always looking for ways to sort things out, to show other people a better way of doing things, thinking about how a situation might go or what should have been done to prevent something going wrong. Over-responsible people constantly analyse the causes of a problem and construct solutions or make rules to keep things in order. Perfectionism, unrealistically high expectations, naivety and fantasies are common in an over-responsible person. This way of being results in poor sleep, poor eating habits and digestion, exhaustion, burn-out, depression and difficulty in relationships. The Emotional Stress Release process can help with finding freedom from such patterns of over-responsibility and its principles can be extended into daily life to deepen the change. In our relationships and activities we need to apply the principle of light contact. In other words, we need to live with more tenderness towards ourselves and others. Drop rigid rules and any attempts to sort other people out. Allow others to make their own choices and choose how to respond in the light of your own needs as well as theirs. Maintain contact and relationship but wait and take some space too, until the situation resolves with more certainty. Tenderness is the pathway to finding freedom from over-responsibility.

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For help with Emotional Stress Release contact Corrina@pathwaybalancing.co.uk Corrina Kennedy, Peterborough, Cambridgeshire, UK

A Hardened Heart Causes Barrenness and Lack

This Sunday I heard Jesus' parable of the sower from the Gospel of Luke. It's the one about the seed falling on different kinds of ground, with differing results. Some seed gets trampled on the hardened path, some falls on rocky ground and sprouts up but quickly withers away, some grows up but gets choked by weeds and thorns and some of the seed goes into good soil and produces up to a hundred times more grain than was sown originally. The soil represents our heart and its condition. The seed represents the life and goodness that comes to us from God. How we receive God's messages, words and provision depends on the state of our heart. The state of our heart in turn determines how fruitful, abundant or fulfilling our life becomes. So we can tell the condition of our heart by checking for any areas of lack, unfulfilled needs or inability to give. So how do we cultivate a heart to be the good soil that is productive and enriching for us and those around us?

A hard heart won't even allow Divine guidance to come in, so our heart must be soft and tender. We harden our hearts to prevent further hurts. We find various ways to be defensive, such as cutting off from people or being critical and perfectionist. To soften our heart we need to have compassion for the woundedness of others and to be kind to one another in our words and behaviour. A shallow heart comes from our insecurities. We adopt superficial masks and try to hide our shortcomings in a form of false pride. To deepen our heart connections we must be open and honest about our human weaknesses. We don't always have to put this into words. Simply acknowledging sensations, such as anxiety, in our heart while being with another person allows us to hold the truth of who we are at greater depth. If our heart is choked with regrets or bitterness from the past, we need to clear these out as soon as possible. We have to forgive ourselves and others for mistakes or poor choices that leave us disadvantaged today. Let them go. Release your cares and burdens into the capable hands of God. Cry your tears, shout out the anger or wrap yourself in a blanket until you are warm, peaceful and ready to sing, dance and run again. A barren heart produces poor relationships characterised by loneliness, neediness or attempts to control. Life becomes a struggle, with low energy, low income or lack of companionship. To transform this situation we must be present, engaged and active, making the most of everything God provides.

It takes rain as well as sunshine to produce a good crop. Weeds grow without effort where there is neglect. Good soil requires attention to make it friutful. So even the difficult days are part of God's plan to test and refine us in preparation for an abundant harvest. Our tears and the heat of anger can soften and break up hardened areas and begin to transform the wilderness. Start from a place of tender-hearted vulnerability and a willingness to remain in relationship.  Our active engagement in the processes of life will turn God's creation into a garden paradise to be shared in enjoyable, fruitful relationships with our God and with each other.

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To find and follow the path of your heart contact us at Corrina@pathwaybalancing.co.uk Corrina Kennedy, Peterborough, Cambridgeshire UK

Moving Towards Heart-Based Living

There are many kinds of pressure and stress experienced as we go through any week in our life. The strange thing is it's not so much what's happening as how we're handling it that makes the difference. For one person their pet might be ill, for another their business is in crisis & putting pressure on finances and close relationships, yet both people may be feeling the same amount of emotional stress or pressure to make the best choices. Our mind is capable of very fast thinking and is able to construct a pattern of branching options stretching out in front of us, almost instantly. Over-thinking can cause emotional overwhelm as the deeper parts of our brain send signals to our system to produce chemicals or muscle-tensions in preparation for the multi-optioned task our mind has set in front of us. This flood of feelings and physical changes may be impossible for the human body to process, especially as time ticks by while we continue to think, wonder, analyse and construct possible options and outcomes. Doing things in our head can create a false sense of safety by hiding our plans from the criticism of others. Looking at every possible outcome before making a move can give us a false illusion of control. This form of worrying can be exhausting, depleting body fluids, over-charging the nervous system and binding up energy in the muscle-fibres. If this way of operating becomes a habit, maybe setting in to a pattern for years, we could develop nervous exhaustion or even chronic fatigue. So how do we apply a solution to this problem?

The solution can be applied instantly and repeatedly. The method needs to be established and then returned to again & again, until it becomes a new way of life. There is no time limit required. It will work immediately and simply be more effective the more often we use it, so there's no pressure. The solution is to move towards a heart-based way of life and be there as often as possible, until it becomes the operating norm. We simply take a deep breath in through the nostrils and as we breath out, mentally take our attention to the area of our heart. That may be all we can do at first but later we can take the process a bit further by consciously relaxing our body and slowing down at the next breath out. In time we may reach the point where we can now feel what's happening in our heart area.

Developing the method further we may be able to extend our awareness to how our whole body feels from this heart perspective. Does the heart area feel tight or closed here, and is this matched by corresponding tension elsewhere in the body, such as a clenched jaw? Is the heart racing on adrenaline and how is this affecting the eyes, breathing, throat or back of neck? At a more advanced and deeper level, this heart-based awareness can be extended to our environment. Can we now feel a shift into spaciousness, beauty or peace? If we take our attention even wider and picture the people who are part of our life, what can we perceive at this heart level? Is there any anxiety? Perhaps there's relief at being part of a whole network of relationships? Maybe there's even a higher awareness of the presence of God in all things and situations? By taking our awareness back into this heart centre, whether for a brief instant or a longer, deeper experience, we begin shifting from head-based analysis and start moving towards heart-based living. The concept of heart-based living is central to the Pathway Balancing Journey. Heart-based awareness helps us navigate towards an experience of paradise on earth, enabling us to overcome the mountain that used to obstruct our path. By processing the emotions and tensions that were held in our heart we can activate healing for our soul. By living with heart consciousness we can resolve, dissolve and transcend the discomfort or pain left over from the past. By finding the gap where our heart needs to flow again we can sit with the discomfort of knowing what's needed now - maybe to simply wait to receive or perhaps give others the space to be their true selves. Trust is developed in the heart. Let your heart come back into rhythm with life as it fills and refills, again and again.

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