In previous Blog Posts, I've mentioned that I set aside an annual Best Year Yet process day, and have recommended the book by Jinny Ditzler that details the method. The book lays out ten key questions that enable you to consider your current position, with its achievements, disappointments and lessons learnt. You can then accurately base your aims for the next twelve months on the reality of where you are now. One of the questions that baffled me for at least ten years was 'How Do You Limit Yourself?' I used to think, "Well if I knew that I'd stop doing it wouldn't I?" Slowly, in more recent years, I've managed to work the ever-changing answer out each time. I then know specifically what to aim for in order to expand beyond my limits in the year ahead. What helped me break through were the follow up questions "What has this cost you?" then "How has this benefited you?"
How would you answer these questions? For example, do you avoid, or keep your head down in, the workplace/marketplace and miss out on promotion or increased income? Has this cost you financial freedom and personal fulfillment? Are there benefits to an undemanding day to day life or avoidance of adult responsibilities? Are you enduring a dismal, or unsatisfying, relationship? Can you see a limiting pattern of stuckness, frustration or disappointment in some area of your life?
Where Are Your Limits?
There was some truth to my earlier puzzlement, that if I knew how I limited myself, I'd stop doing it wouldn't I? In an interview with John Bishop, Russell Brand put it brilliantly when he spoke about addictions, saying "They should just stop doing it shouldn't they? It's obvious!! But to the addicted person, it isn't - they usually have no idea why they keep doing this to themselves, which in turn makes them feel even more guilt and shame". If the barriers to freedom were simply visible as a row of fences or brick walls, you could knock them down or climb over them. The limits themselves are actually almost invisible but the unwanted effects are your greatest evidence.
I believe the location of your limits is held in your body. Your limits are produced by your emotions. The limiting patterns are bound up by the beliefs you attach to your feelings. Your outer environment, and your relationships with other people, reflect back to you the limiting patterns being expressed by your soul. The good news is that, once you become conscious of your limits, you can choose which patterns to hold and which ones to resolve.
Expanding Beyond Your Former Limits
Firstly let me emphasise the importance of having, and knowing, your limitations. Trying to ignore the limits of your human reality is a major cause of such things as exhaustion, burn out, injury, financial loss or broken relationships. Having unrealistic expectations, or hugely optimistic imaginary scenarios, can be disastrous. As I heard during a talk at my High School Reunion earlier this month, "We can all dream big, but making those dreams a reality is an entirely different matter." So while we need to have, and know, our limitations, it's also natural and vital to expand beyond them at various stages and seasons in our life. The essence of my work in therapy and personal development, is the process of the soul coming into Earthly life through the body. I want to find, and deal with, the root causes of a problem, so it's finally resolved and doesn't keep on repeating. My studies of human physical development give me clues about the starting point of an embodied pattern. When I perceive a connection with a stage of physical development, I have an opportunity to work with a person to resolve and repattern their physical, emotional and quantum-level energy patterns.
In the first week of our body's development from a fertilised egg, our substance is held in the transparent sphere of the Zona Pelucida, as the cells divide and multiply in number. However, the cells soon become compressed against each other, with no more room for our growth or development. If we stayed within the safe limits of the Zona Pelucida, we would never become the person we were designed to be. On the fifth day, the Zona Pelucida of a fertilised egg begins to dissolve and the body is no longer limited to a maximum of 32 identical cells. To grow beyond your former limitations, you must first know, and rest in, your safe comfort zone until you have grown enough. Then one day, when the cost of staying safe begins to out weigh its benefits, you begin to slowly, gently, carefully reach out into your stretch zone, as the old familiar boundaries begin to dissolve.
For details of the book 'Best Year Yet' by Jinny Ditzler, click here.
Find out more about booking your FREE 30-minute initial consultation HERE
Receive your FREE 12-page guide, to take you from toxic relationships to your destiny More Details